The Everlast - Star Light, Star Bright #03

(B. Schatz)

The Everlast - Chapter 01 - Star Light, Star Bright #03
by B. Schatz

Peter emerged from the lower deck and took a look around him.

Surrounding him on all sides were pictures of the night sky, full of many stars that were glittering their golden sheen from great distances away, and one that was coming closer as his ship flowed through the air.

“There it is,” he said quite loudly, pointing straight ahead, “The solution to our troublesome lack of sleep.”

The crew cheered dimly, and a few even made the effort to raise an arm into the air and wave it in a weak form of celebration.

“Pips!”

‘Yes captain?’

“About how much time would you say we have before we’re close enough to catch it?”

‘I’d venture to say somewhere in between a moment and a jiffy,’ Pips offered, ‘Although my math could be quite off at this point in time.’

“Well, if you’re anywhere near being correct, you’ll need to take Lewis and stir up the Ugly Boys. Tell them that we’ll need their services with the net,” Peter commanded.

‘Lewis claims to be busy minding his hat,’ Pips quickly informed.

“Ah,” Peter paused, “Well, you best leave him to it then, and rouse the Uglies yourself.”

‘You can’t be serious, sir.’

Peter looked at Pips, making sure that he composed himself with an air of unquestionable leadership.

“You can never underestimate the importance of a well kept hat,” he stated.

Pips sighed.

‘Yes sir. I’ll rouse them right away.’

“Excellent,” Peter smiled, turning to look directly at the star.

It’s golden aura shimmered quite beautifully, casting a warm glow against the utter empty blackness of the space behind it.

Soon, it would be his.

Ω

Starcrosser Gower stepped aboard the transport vessel and immediately set to assessing the situation at hand using the patented John Gower method of obtaining information in a timely fashion.

“Can anyone tell me what’s going on here?” he stated gruffly.

“Blow it out yer hole!” came a response from the room.

Immediately triangulating the direction the words had come from, Gower shot towards a sheepish looking man wearing a hat who was trying really hard to look very busy with his keyboard and monitor.

“And what, exactly, was that all about?” he questioned venomously.

“What was what all about?” the man stated quite nervously.

“I heard what you said son, and I don’t appreciate the quality and tone of the words,” he grumbled.

“Aw, suck an egg,” came a reply.

“Excuse me?”

The nervous man sighed and turned around in the chair, “I’m sorry sir, it’s not me, it’s the hat.”

“You honestly expect me to believe that?”

“You heard the boy John,” a commanding voice sounded from behind his back, “Now leave him to his work.”

Gower closed his eyes in frustration, recognizing the voice within an instant.

“Bill, what are you doing here?” he asked quite bitterly while he turned to face the voice’s owner.

“Why, you know very well that I was promoted to Chief of Anomalies and Troublesome Events at the Hopeless Wonder,” Bill explained quite calmly, “Where else would I be when trouble finally brings itself to this division of Everything?”

“Apparently, on the side of the troublemaker, defending the snot-nosed and petulant,” John stated, pointing at the source of the ill-tempered remarks.

“Ah, yes, well, the remarks you heard were indeed quite course and rude, but there is no reason to blame young Mr. Hornby when it is his hat that’s to blame.”

“His hat?”

“Yes, his hat,” Bill grinned, “You are, no doubt, quite familiar with the protocol that states that all personnel located on the Hopeless Wonder, or on vessels associated with the Hopeless Wonder are to wear N. Consistency and Co.’s specially designed protective headwear correct?”

“Yes, but-“

“Well, Hornby here had the misfortune of being hired at a time when our supply was short, and so we had to give him one of the hats that had been made prior to the current run. All we had remaining in our stock was one of those ironic ‘Hard Hats’ that spews insults when provoked. Quaint little thing, but it gets quite cumbersome after you have to listen to it pontificate for long spats of time.”

“Your mother wears army boots!” it exclaimed ruefully.

“Indeed she does,” Bill stated serenely, “But sadly, her fashion sense will have to be a topic for another day. We seem to have yet another star crisis on our hands that must be dealt with presently, but you’ll have to forgive me if I’m a bit foggy on the details, having just been notified of the trouble myself. If you would care to expand on the case for me, that would be greatly appreciated John.”

Starcrosser Gower opened his mouth and tersely replied, “I too, have just arrived, and was attempting to assess the situation myself.”

“Ah, so you know nothing as well,” Bill stated, leaning over Hornby’s shoulder to take a look at what his monitor was showing, “I suppose that is the punishment I reap for assuming you knew of your assignment.”

Gower seethed silently.

“Interesting,” Bill whispered, looking at the screen with an intense interest, “Quite interesting indeed.”

“What is interesting?” Gower demanded to know.

Bill pointed at the screen, “It’s a ship.”

“Thanks Tips,” the Hard Hat grumbled.

“A sailing ship. As in the kind that sails the watery High Seas with masts and scaffolding and the whole glorious works. How exactly it is floating it’s way through the Low Seas, well…” Bill pulled himself upright, “That is a question I would like to see answered.

“John? See to it that when we confront this ship that we take whoever is in charge into custody.”

“Bill, surely as the Chief of Anomalies and Troublesome Events at the Hopeless Wonder, you are aware that protocol about any vessels that approach a star without the proper clearance: To prevent any chance of damage to the existence of Everything, the offender must be eradicated, whether the man in charge would like to satisfy his curiosity for floating boats or not.”

Bill looked at John, his smile remaining calm.

“Starcrosser Gower, I understand your concern. Really, I do,” he stated quite evenly, “You are a very ‘by the book’ kind of fellow, always making sure that Everything continues to exist unfettered by the various evils that plague our world, but… as you will quickly learn, working your way through the hierarchy as a Starcrosser, things aren’t always as black and white as the protocols in the handbook we are given when we start training. There is a larger game being played, and we’re all just pieces. So, when someone of higher rank gives you a specific command, you carry it out without any questions. Understood?”

John’s face told Bill that he was angry, so his mouth decided that it didn’t need to say away before his legs carried him away in a huff.

“Ponce,” the hat snapped.

“Indeed,” Bill agreed, “Let’s move onward, everyone. We’ve got Everything to think of and only so much time to do it in.”