A Drinking Game for the New TV Season!

(B. Schatz)

Premiere week is like Christmas for me, as I am addicted to television. I shouldn't because most of it sucks beyond all belief, but every year I think: maybe this year will be different.

And every year, I'm woefully wrong.

So, instead of crying because the shows are horrible, I've decided to cry because I'm going to be piss drunk while watching the television, and here's how I'm going to do it.

Chug one beer - For every second I accidently watch one of those boring proceedural shows (CSI, Bones, etc.) after not changing the channel quick enough.

Drink one shot - For every woman who gets raped...

Drink two shots - ...if she's a hooker...

Drink three - ...if "she" is a man in drag.

Drink one shot - For every "soap opera shot" on The O.C.

Chug one beer - For every time someone gets punched on The O.C.

Chug two beers - Because you actually watch The O.C.

Drink one shot - For every time you laugh at a sitcom (the only ones that this will be dangerous for will be Arrested Developement, My Name is Earl, and The Office, even though the english version will always be better...)

Drink a pitcher of beer - For every actor or actress that appears on any show on The WB who makes their way to a poor quality teen flick.

Break into a liquor store, and empty it's contents _For every laugh that Joey brings you. Which will be none.

...and that's all the rules for now. If you can think of more, add a comment below! It shall be added.